Making Assumptions

Disclaimer: this is an endless ramble

I think that as a person I make way too many assumptions, and I blame that on my inherent fear of the unknown.

I’m not sure if we all have that but I’ve been wanting to talk about this for a while. A few days back I was on a long bus ride with Phionna, talking about how we place labels on each other and give one another expectations to live up to, an image to fit into or a reputation to keep up. This stupid cycle continues as we continue to fear meeting new people, to interact with others.

I’m not sure why we do that. Why do we label the people we don’t know well so often? Is it because we’re afraid that they get some sort of leverage over us by knowing about us first from other ‘sources’? Is it because we want leverage over them? Or is it simply because it’s just easier to use simple adjectives to describe such complex people?

I think labels are horrible- we hate it when people do it to us but we do it to others over and over and over again. I hate it when people make assumptions about me and what I like what I do, worse, still, the kind of person I am; but really I do it to people too. ‘She’s nice.’ or ‘Oh, she’s a nerd.’ I’m sure there’s so much more to every person than that one label which we use to dump a person into a certain category where she’s just ‘one of that kind’. No one’s one of a certain kind, everyone’s their own kind. And I suppose the day we stop governing how we interact with new people according to these labels, is the day we are ready to genuinely start a relationship with a person from scratch, no masks, no pretenses, no ‘trying to talk about what I assume you like’ or ‘let me say things I assume you’d want to hear so I can be your friend’.

And I think it’s undeniable that we make assumptions all the time because of our fear of the unknown. It’s always better to know something than nothing at all, it’s like jumping into a river not knowing what’s in there, or into a black hole not knowing what’s underneath. I suppose it’s a fear we may never get rid of, and this might just be part of getting a foothold to get to understand people and things around us better.

So I guess making all these preconceived judgements are alright, but I just hope that there’ll never come the day where I allow these assumptions I make to protect myself, become a self-imposed obstacle between me and a priceless relationship.

[If you read till the end, I’m sorry I just put you through all that, really ): ]


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